Brave and Excellent

I started a new book by Paulo Coehlo called The Fifth Mountain.  As with all of his books, there is a vein that runs through it that pumps the concept of faith, love and hope through the storyline, and gives me moments of "Huh.  What a great thought."  He's a real simple writer: short sentences, straightforward story, and very little boom by comparison with other novel writers.  He helps me meditate and puts me in a completely different mindset, and I find myself dog-earing the pages so I can go back and think about what he is saying.

What is the point of this little plug for Coehlo, you ask?  I suppose I just wanted to share what makes me tick on any given day, and because of this line in the book:  "...oftentimes a man's fate has nothing to do with what he believes or fears."

The line spoke to me for a reason of which I am going to try to explain.  I'm 38 years old and spent 36 of those years with the idea that if I do good, good will come; if I am kind, I am invincible from all the pain and suffering of this life; that if I seek love - romantic or otherwise - with an optimistic heart, it will come to me tenfold; that if I believe I am protected, I will be protected.

I don't think I believe that stuff anymore.  I cannot control my fate - what happens on any given day around me and inside my world - I can only control how I react to it.  This leads me to another of my favorite concepts in the book.  The main character is speaking to a young boy.  The young boy says, "I'm afraid."  Instead of telling the young boy not to be afraid because it's ridiculous and a waste of time, the elder answers with "That proves that you find joy in living.  It's normal to feel fear at certain moments."

I never thought of fear like that!  It kind of takes this powerful, negative emotion - FEAR - and spins it around, doesn't it?  Jeez, how awesome to think that every time you are afraid you can feel blessed that 1) it's normal and 2) it's only because you find joy in living.  Joy.  So much more powerful than fear, isn't it?

It kind of goes hand in hand with what a friend of mine wrote to me in a sympathy card after my Dad died.  He said "Never forget that you are brave and excellent."  I don't know if I've heard more comforting words in all this time, through all these struggles I have faced.  Brave.  I have been advised to "stay strong", "keep your chin up", "keep the faith", etc. but I have never been told that I am brave.  I feel as though him calling me brave and excellent defines me as a warrior of sorts:  I am standing, shielded, and ready to face whatever fate throws at me, regardless of my beliefs and fears because I find joy in living.  It's all interconnected.  And that is why I have one more piece to share from The Fifth Mountain. Again, the elder is speaking to the young boy.  

"All life's battles teach us something, even those we lose.  When you grow up, you'll discover that you have defended lies, deceived yourself, or suffered for foolishness.  If you're a good warrior, you will not blame yourself for this, but neither will you allow your mistakes to repeat themselves."

I guess being brave allows you to understand this last paragraph because it is so filled with wisdom, and it recognizes humility and honesty with yourself as two very important factors in succeeding through all of life's trials.  It shuns the false bravado and understands that facing the pain, the struggles and the disappointments is what is necessary in order to overcome them and find that joy in living.  You need to be brave.

And excellent.

Kinda like Paulo Coehlo.